Photo Credit: i.huffpost.com
Do you keep getting the raised eyebrow from your lady every time you poop out (not literally, I hope) during sex?
Premature ejaculation jokes aside, if
• you are getting muscle cramps,
• your lungs are on fire (instead of HER out of breath)
• or you keep making her get on top cause you’re worn out,
it might be time to step up your game, sir.
Just cause she hasn’t complained YET, doesn’t mean she isn’t telling her girlfriends/nail lady/hair dresser/next door neighbor and anyone else who will listen, all about your physical fitness inadequacies in the bedroom.
We can’t have that kind of stuff going on, you’ve got a reputation to uphold man!
Don’t worry brother, I’ve got just the workout for you to kick your bedroom game into overdrive so that all she will be talking about with her friends next week is how sore she is.
We have 3 key areas YOU need to work on the get in tip-top sex-shape:
• Cardio conditioning
• Hip-thrust strength endurance
• PC muscle control
Alright, let’s get down to it and outline your “workout so you can bang-it-out”:
1. Cardio, Cardio and More Cardio.
No matter how amazing your technique is, getting tired after 72 seconds just isn’t going to get her there my friend.
What you need is the ability to sustain whatever that thing is that you’re doing, for as long as it takes to either make her happy or make her need to tweet about it (or both). So, what’s the best thing you can do for cardio?
• Sprint intervals!
Get yourself to the local park that has a nice, long hill or onto the damn treadmill on incline 15% and HAUL ASS in 30 second intervals of work and rest.
Run (I said RUN; not walk, jog or saunter) for half a minute, then walk for the same amount of time.
Repeat this 10 times over.
Being on an incline will make you have to drive from the hips more, using more total muscle and thereby creating more total body work. Your lungs will be on fire and your butt cheeks will be screaming at you, but trust me when I say in just a couple weeks, you will be a whole new man in the cardio department.
Did I mention these sprint intervals will also help you burn off some fat so you’ll look even better than you already do?
You can thank me later.
2. Good Sex is All in the HIPS!
It’s true, and the single best exercise that you can do to improve this critical skillset, is the kettlebell swing.
• Get yourself a moderately heavy kettlebell and perform a hip-hinge movement, driving your pelvis forward with each swing and clenching your buttocks as hard as you can. 3 sets of 20 reps and you’re good to go! Need a better visual? Check out this video for some pointers.
3. What the Hell are the PC Muscles?
Well, I can tell you they aren’t in your computer, so stop looking. Sheesh.
PC or pubococcygeus muscles are deep in your pelvic floor and they are responsible for controlling the flow of urine, helping to increase blood flow to an erection and controlling premature ejaculation.
• Doing kegel exercises can help you to maintain a firmer erection, for longer and hopefully I don’t need to draw a diagram to explain how beneficial THAT would be to getting the job done with your sex partner.
Try not to get into the habit of doing these exercises too often or you might have your picture put on a carton of milk from lack of leaving the house.
Remember when I said you can thank me later? Well, it’s later.
Small, unmarked bills please.